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Fatt Matt's LiveJournal:
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| Wednesday, May 10th, 2006 | | 8:54 pm |
After a year im back
Helping people sucks.... i don't know why I try so hard to help people, and all it does is get me hurt, or makes me look like the bad guy. well basically to everyone who i have tried to help i hope i did some good, but to everyone else IM DONE!!! So don't ask me anymore, cause i am sick of caring for people and then getting treated like crap and being the bad guy! so IM DONE! | | Tuesday, April 19th, 2005 | | 9:51 pm |
2 days till my b-day
2 days till my b-day YAY Current Mood:  calmCurrent Music: go it alone- our mistakes | | Friday, March 11th, 2005 | | 3:37 pm |
oh man here i go again....
well to all who do not know.... i have been in redding for a week. It's been great. I have been happy spending time with my brothers and my friends up here. I have met some awesome people. I met this awesome girl, we have been hanging out every day, it's going great. I have been still talking to alot of people from back home, cause no matter how i try and get away i can't. People seem to call me or i just get so bored i need to talk to my friends from home. I hung out @ simpson last night and it was awesome. I got to get to know jodi's boyfriend, clay and his gf, zach and jana, and i got to pray with carla about our situation, and we gave it up to god, and it was one of the most awesomest things i have ever done. Because i felt god just there and being with both of us while we were giving up to god instead of just jumping into something. But it's weird, cause i know she likes me, and i like her back, but its hard cause she's just so busy this week, and has a lot of homework and prior engagements that she has to do, and it's hard cause i have nothing to do up here that much, so i really wanna just hangout with her. But i just don't know how to feel. she's an awesome person, and i just wanna let it happen between us whatever it is that god wants. I have a huge problem! I THINK TOO MUCH! I just wanna go home. and just be happy, because i am happy up here, but i really wanna just be at home and do what i wanna do and do what i gotta do to stay stable. I miss the gym. I wanna get buff.... oh well... i miss most of my friends. I miss megan. she is becoming one of my best friends, and i told her everything about carla. and she's for it, but i am too it's just weird, but good. anyways i need to just shut up now..... bye Current Mood: confused but happyCurrent Music: allegiance- no dice | | Friday, February 11th, 2005 | | 12:16 pm |
yo
i just got an ipod yesterday... and i already have it almost completely full... it's funny.... i need a 40gig.... i got a 20...its cool though i have needed one for a while, cause i have so much freakin music.... and the stuff that is on there is just a little bit of what i have.... Current Mood: contentCurrent Music: old school suckas.....(shop11phoenix) | | Sunday, January 30th, 2005 | | 4:10 pm |
yah
i love all my friends....but there is way too much drama and confusion going on in their lives.... it's lame. but oh well.... im doing freakin great! Current Mood: cheerfulCurrent Music: Verse- Rebuild | | Wednesday, January 26th, 2005 | | 12:55 am |
ok fuck that whole last post fuck it! party! Current Mood: partyCurrent Music: obie trice(cause greyhm is making me listen to him) Party | | Saturday, January 22nd, 2005 | | 5:53 pm |
Yay
Im actually happy with my life right now. I have great friends, family, great jobs, a great god, great music, and I am actually happy with who i am and i am a freakin sweetheart! Yay i love my life FINALLY! YAY! Current Mood: happyCurrent Music: Killing The Dream | | Thursday, September 16th, 2004 | | 11:56 pm |
Situation.....
We basically I am done liking a certin person that i have liked for the day i met her, which is kinda sad for me cause she was very special to me. It sucks cause I really care about her a lot as a friend, but not being able to have feelings about her is hard cause i liked her more than i have ever liked someone ever in my life, and it sucks cause it will never be, and with me it will be hard for me to hangout with her. But i am gonna do my best to not let myself get that way around her cause she her friendship is one of the most important things to me. Cause I care about her alot. I don't wanna make her feel unconfortable when i am around her cause i don't think she desirves that. Now it's time for me to move on and start a friendship with her without liking her becasue if i do it's not goona be the kind of friendship that she would want to have with me. Same with me. You know who you are... and all i wanna say is I AM SORRY! I have made a big deal out of this tons of times now I will NEVER BRING IT UP AGAIN! But I am looking forward to starting a new friendship with you and keeping the old friendship alive, but with out liking you. So you read this and now it's done. Current Mood: happyCurrent Music: Showbread- Mouth Like A Magazine......New Song!!! | | Friday, September 3rd, 2004 | | 2:01 pm |
yeah
So things are getting better for me.(iguess) but i have lost a whole bunch of weight since the beginning of the year. I was 300 pounds on New Years day, and now im 260 and thats really awesome for me, and i went down 1 whole shirt size. Laura came back. We went and got her a bike yesterday. We found this really awesome crusier bike for 10 bucks at the dumps. It had no seat, but we are gonna fix it up and hopefully make it look pretty. I get to see Nightwish tonight, These Days/Killing the Dream tommorow, Engine Down/New Trust/Polar Bears on Sun and Jacobsen Lane at Gales on Sunday night. And Im stoked for the cool shows this weekend. Eric is coming down for the KTD/TheseDays Show. So that will be cool. I am ready for whatever comes my way in the next couple months. We will see what comes up and happens. Fattmatt.com Current Mood: contentCurrent Music: The Chariot | | Thursday, August 19th, 2004 | | 1:20 pm |
i actually update?
So i have been going thru so much lately i haven't even had a chance to write in my live journal.... oh sad.... anyways, so i hurt my leg real bad. First I popped a blood vesel in my leg playing KICKBALL!, then i fell on the ice @ the iceskating rink, and then i hurt leg even more playing softball with safeway (yayaY!) So i have been limping around everywhere. Supposivally I have been a dick to alot of people lately, and i don't mean to but i guess i am. And that sucks, cause it just adds to my crappy time i have been having. But oh well. On the good part of things Laura is coming back this SAT! We are gonna go see DROWNING POOL! @ the phoenix not by choice i just have to work it, so she's gonna come and hangout with me and ben and chase and make fun of all the stupid Bro's that are gonna show up and try to be tough but my hxc friends will show them different.... but ya. So ya... i just want to let all know about 2 awesome shows coming up! Sept 4th, Sat 8:00pm $7.00 Killing The Dream Set Your Goals At Risk Set It Straight Sabertooh Zombie @ the Phoenix Oct 10th, Sunday 7:00pm $12.00 (an insipid production) Unearth Terror Black Dahlia Murder Remembering Never @ The Pound Current Mood:  confusedCurrent Music: Horse The Band- Cutsman | | Tuesday, June 8th, 2004 | | 12:19 pm |
Fatt Matt's Life lately
Well where should i start off. Things actually have been going fine for me, I haven't been emo at all lately, i have just been fine. I got a new phone (yay) i also went to a show that wasn't at the phoenix. Saw an awesome band from LA that i have been wanting to see for a while, Donny Brook! they rule. I have been working alot at safeway lately, but i have still had time to hangout with people. work is going good there. I have been listening to a lot of good hxc lately, the new these days and llt is freaking amazing!!! plus In Due Time and Killing the Dream cd's have not left my car since i got them they are great cds! I am waiting on god to send someone my way, so i am being patient and having fun doing it actully. It's great. Current Mood: goodCurrent Music: Life Long Tragedy- Make or Break | | Saturday, May 8th, 2004 | | 3:13 pm |
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
i am so sick of not having anyone. I try and not think about it. But the only 1 I want doesn't want me. It sucks, but oh well. I am just gonna have to wait on God to put the right person in my life. I don't want anything real serious right now, I just want someone who I can spend time with. I know everytime I write in this journal I complain, but my heart can't take it much more. I try not to let my feelings get in the way but it hurts too much. I am gonna try and focus more on God, and see what he has for me, but then if he feels im ready he will bring someone to me. Hopefully the one I really want in my life, but if not, im sure he will provide the perfect person for me. Merica! fattmatt.com Current Mood:  drainedCurrent Music: Killing The Dream- Picking Up The Pieces | | Monday, May 3rd, 2004 | | 12:55 pm |
girlfriend
i need a girlfriend, someone find me one please i will give you a dollar. fattmatt Current Mood: sadCurrent Music: zao-where blood and fire bring rest | | Monday, April 26th, 2004 | | 10:10 am |
life
life has sucked lately, i have tried to do things that don't make me sad, but basically i can't find anything that won't make me sad. Well here's how my weekend went.... friday: i had all day off i relaxed and then went to the phoenix... sat: I worked from 9-6 @ Safeway, and then Worked @ the phoenix from 7-12. I hung out with a lot of people that night. I saw laura and gab, and Laura and I worked out everything. and we decieded to be friends still. But Everything is cool now, she still didn't act weird around me. Then that night i hung out with Lyndsie and some bad drama happened with the other lindsey and marcus, but basically that worked out fine. Sunday: I woke up at 2:30 and left for downtown @ 4ish, i went to the phoenix, and then boardshop, chase and i went to coldstone, then i got a call from Lyndsie, we talked for a few minutes. I then called her back and asked her if she wanted to hangout. So we did, I went to In&Out and picked her up, then we drove all around Santa Rosa trying to find something to do, so we went to the mall, and it was closed, but i saw poopdick. That was cool. Then we saw this poster for the Movie "Mean Girls" i really wanna see that movie and she does to, so we went to the roxy to see if it was out and it wasn't, so we went to the Guy's house, hungout with Kole for a while, then we went to Krispy Kreme and tried to eat a whole dozen doughnuts together, but we could only finish 3 a piece, we were at Krispy Kreme for about 1hr, and talked and got to know eachother a little better, then we were still trying to find things to do, and i saw a Ralph's in Santa Rosa, so we went to Ralphs, and we went down every single Isle in the store talking about food and stuff, it was kinda funny, but really fun. Then we left Ralphs, and I wasn't paying attention, and i ran a red light, she thought it was funny when i freaked out like a baby when i did it, cause i was so scared. But it was funny, so then later in the night, the light just turned yellow, and i hit my breaks really hard and don't run the yellow light cause i was scared, and she was cracking up the whole time, but oh well. So we hungout for a while more and then i dropped her off at Ian's house where lindsey was and gave her a hug and went back to p-town. Then i went to Lyons with Cody, it was cool i ate a giant bowl of chili and then i made a deposit(if ya know what i mean) and went to sleep. Today is cool. But I am hungry now so I am going to go get food. Bye. Current Mood: awakeCurrent Music: Coheed and Cambria- New cd, awesome | | Wednesday, April 21st, 2004 | | 1:30 pm |
Worst Birthday Ever So Far.....
Well where should I start? Well first off i can't even wake up without my parentds bugging me about if I am going to drink or not. And my dad and I get in a big fight because of it. Then I have to go to school at 9am. So I had to sit through 2 really boring classes. Then I am on my way home to hangout with my dad cause he feels that I don't care about the family, and that I need to take some time and hangout with them, so I decied to come home, and on my f*ckin way home, I get pulled over, cause I was speeding 45 in a 30 whoopie, for those who have ever drove with me you know my car is fast, but piece of crap, cause when its says im going 45 im really going 35, but oh well. So I get a freakin ticket, I call my dad to let him know, and he gets pissed off at me. So then I go home and my parents are both yelling at me, and then he tries and put a cerfew on my for tonight. He told me that I have to be home at 11pm. I went nuts! There is no way in F*ckng Hell. But finally after talking back and forth i have to be home @ 12, but im gonna come home when i want anyways. So basically, i am hoping that the rest of my day will go fine, cause no the fun starts, i get to see ashley, and laura tonight so i am ready to have fun finally.! Current Mood:  angryCurrent Music: As I Lay Dying-Live @ The Phoenix | | Tuesday, April 20th, 2004 | | 7:52 pm |
Birthday!!!!
My birthday is in less than 4 hours!!!! I am turning 21! It's gonna be so awesome!!!! I have school from 9-3, but after that it's on!!! I am going to hangout with my best friend Ashley from 3:30-6, then from 6-6:30 is poop dick/taco time, then i am going to visit Kailey and while i am in RoPo im gonna visit Ben my hardcore kid jew friend, then im gonna chill for a few min with james, and then from 8-10:30 is laura-time! i get to hangout with laura, gab, and Meininger! Then from 10:30 on im gonna hangout with my guy friends at Gales but i won't know if i am going to drink till it comes down to me actually doing it or not, but we will see. If you are 21 and a friend of mine, your welcome to come to Gales, or if you can get in to Gales your welcome to come. And give me presents! Jk, if you want your welcome to but you don't have to. Fattmatt.com Current Mood:  anxiousCurrent Music: Shockwave/Nodes/Seventh Star | | Friday, April 16th, 2004 | | 1:42 pm |
5 Days!!!!
5 days till I turn 21! April 21st is gonna be awesome! I am Ready for all challengers! Bring it. Im fattmatt.com sucka! Current Mood: dorkyCurrent Music: Hammertime- SK8 or Die | | Tuesday, April 13th, 2004 | | 1:31 pm |
Lame Night Last Night....
So I went to a "cocktail party" which was kinda lame in my opinion, because me and jourdan were the only ones not drink, and it was weird, casue I am turning 21 in less than a week and i don't know if i wanna drink or not still. It's a tough decision for me to make. But anyways I was at that party and I was around people that i think don't really like me as much cause im not in their little "cliq" but oh well, it felt really weird. I left as much as i could if someone needed a ride i would drivve as much as i could, and i was just really bored, cause it was lame to me, then i went to 7-11 w/james, kristy, alyssa and it was fun cause i was bumping my METAL mix and james was diggin every song i played even though he always tells me that my music sucks, but oh well. then we get back to the party, and the 4 of us decide to go up stairs and just chill, it was nice for about 5 minutes until everyone came over, and then it was just everyone kept coming in the room, and then everyone started going swiming in a cold pool, but it was funny cause greyhm grabbed Money B and jumped in the pool with him, with all their clothes on. That was hella funny, and then i kinda was like fuck it i guess i can have a good time, so i was chilin with Dallas and Money B. But they were all drunk too, but they are funny as hell when they are trashed. Anyways, it sucked cause last night i tried not to think about anything that would make me feel emo, but it was hard with everyone being in their little groups, and me kinda being bored by myself, i mean people came and tried to talk to me, and i did but it just was lame, cause of stupid groups. But oh well, then we left around 12:45ish, and i took everyone back to james' house, and then i went home, had a great talk with ashley and went to bed. I guess the best part of my night was going to sleep, isn't that lame. fattmatt.com Current Mood:  blahCurrent Music: These Days- This is Ours | | Monday, April 12th, 2004 | | 2:49 pm |
Shows this weekend
Friday April 16 All Bets Off These Days Make Move Final Fight Jealous Again Burton Center 7421 Burton Ave Rohnert Park $6/ starts at 7:30 APRIL 17TH AS I LAY DYING THE BLACK DAHLIA MURDER EVERYTIME I DIE SCARLET THE PHOENIX THEATER 201 WASHINGTON STREET PETALUMA, CA 94952 8PM $12 HTTP://WWW.THEPHOENIXTHEATER.COM Current Mood: calmCurrent Music: Dead Poetic- New Medicines | | Monday, April 5th, 2004 | | 11:10 am |
To my friends.....HELP!
So I am at the point in my life, to where I haven't had a girlfriend. It sucks really bad! I have been trying most of my life to find someone to go out with, but it never seems to work. I can't even find someone to go on a date with me. It hurts a lot. I have been trying for this 1 girl but everytime I start to think she is intrested in me, she stops showing intrest in me. I don't know what it is or whatever. I like her a lot, and I really wanna presue something with her, but I don't know what to do about it. So what I have decieded to do is... give up on it. Now people reading my "live journal" will say "matt don't give up on it if you really like her then she is worth waiting for" or stuff like that. But I am at the point in my life to where I am turning 21 in less than 2 weeks, and my whole teenage years were wasted without anyone. I DO NOT want my years as an adult to be the same. So here is my challenge to anyone who reads my journal. You are obviously one of my friends if you read this. But what I would like you to do is try and help me find someone to date, or hangout with or whatever. I am not looking for a super serious relationship, but I am looking for a realtionship. I am looking for a girl that is funny, great to be around, smart, down to earth, it doesn't matter if they are christian or not. They have to like music. They must not care what I look like, but my personallity. Please to all my friends, please help me out. I know it's not going to make me completely happy if I have a girlfriend or not, but it will at least take aways some of the pain that I have in my heart, from never experiencing life. So please just give me a chance, and see if you have anyone that you know of that is single and looking for a great guy like me. I know this sounds desprate, but at this point in my life, i don't care anymore, I just want to have someone to be with. So help a brotha out. Fattmatt Current Mood: anxiousCurrent Music: Underoath- The Sun Still Sleeps |
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